The best laid plans

Apologies to my armies of fans who are waiting on tenterhooks for my next words of wisdom.

Ok, though I do like to kid myself occasionally, I know I neither have armies of fans nor words of wisdom to divulge. But I do owe apologies, at the very least to myself, that I’ve been a bit tardy in writing on here lately.

You may remember, that this blog was supposed to be about my life as a newly freed-from-employment lady. When I left my job I had three and a half months of glorious freedom that I could write about, and I promised myself I would post at least once a week.

Then I picked up a couple of little contracts working from home, which have taking over my life a bit recently. Not that I’ve minded. I’ve met some lovely new people, both real, and twitter folk, surprised myself by writing about fashion accessories (like I know…), and had fun building databases, and finding IT solutions for stuff – what can I say, I am a geek.

Now though, it’s all slowing down. My little social media contract has come to an end, and I’m down from three to just one day a week for the other one. Slowly, I’m beginning to get used to having a bit more time again. It’s great. But I have to agree with the old cliche, I don’t know how I had the time to work.

I will never be a fantastic housekeeper, cleaning is soul destroying – you do it and five minutes later the dog has walked across the newly hoovered carpet with paws that have come directly from digging through to Australia (only a little bit of an exaggeration I assure you), but anyhow, my home has never been cleaner. I’m tidying and polishing, chucking stuff away willy nilly, and generally going all housewiferly. Who’da thought?

I’ve also got into sewing, not only making cushions, clothes, and tablecloths, but cross-stitching and crocheting too. My tidy home is being taken over by craft paraphanalia. As with all things, I’m a bit rubbish at all those things – far too impatient, but I’m learning and enjoying, and feel as if I’m growing a bit too. And it does tear me away from my beloved laptop, which is probably a good thing, as I could easily spend all day, everyday, sitting tapping away in a little imaginary world of my own, which I realise probably wouldn’t be at all healthy.

Of course that doesn’t mean I’ve given up writing all together, but just been busy doing other stuff lately.

Like volunteering. I applied to the local hospice as soon as I left work, I thought it would get me out of the house, and working in a team, all that sort of stuff, as well as helping me to be a useful member of society. Well, they didn’t have a permanent regular position open, so I’ve been doing odds and ends of admin for them. Now, guess what? I’ve got a project going for them. I’m working from home. Building a database. And a spreadsheet. On my laptop. Hey ho…

p.s. No, I’ve not been gardening. Our lovely patch is awash with weeds as it waits to have its makeover. And that’s another story…!

This post is challenging

Writing a post feels like work today.  I’ve got loads of other things to do.  It’s that time of year.  The time when I should be dashing about shopping, wrapping, writing cards, panicking about who’s doing what.  Instead, I’ve been sitting here for an hour or two, trying desperately to write something vaguely interesting, as well as vaguely entertaining.

Three times I’ve written stuff and deleted it before I’ve got to the end.

I didn’t mean for it to become work.  It was supposed to be fun.  Supposed to get me in writing mode.  But today it’s pressure.  I haven’t posted anything for a few days, I must do it.  Must post.  Must post…

Do other blogger’s feel like this?  I don’t want to lose the (very) small number of readers I’ve got by  abandoning them at the first hurdle.  Regular posting is the way to build followers they say…  Must post something…

The daily prompt wasn’t helpful.  ‘My Hero’.  Hmm. Can’t think of one. I could be cheesy and say someone who’s been battling adversity, some celeb or other, or a superhero (well, those tight outfits they wear can be quite fetching).  What about a sporty type?  Nope, not a big fan.  Besides the only sports I watch (never participate in, please note) are team jobbies – Cricket, Rugby.  Though of course, did watch our Bradley winning the tour. He was a bit of a hero for that, but overall, not really ‘my hero’ material.

What about a band, a musician that’s inspired me?  Some talented bod who’s made a ton of money by doing a bit of singing.  Nope, not exactly hero’s are they?

Explorer’s?  People that battle against tough terrain, freaky weather, fearsome animals to get….somewhere.  Why…?  Nope, don’t get it.  Just sounds reckless, feckless.

Spacemen?  People hurtling into space, thrown around, eating dried food and seeing their pens float away (not to mention pooing in funny toilets).  No, again, don’t get it.  So you see the Earth from a distance?  So what?  (I’ve bought a globe, it’s much easier) Only crazy individuals, not hero’s, would volunteer for that surely?

Bet lot’s of people would say their dad, and all I would say to that is… No, no, and thrice no.

No sorry Daily Prompt people, I failed, miserably, to come up with anyone. Thinking about it, I don’t think I even know what a hero is now.

Well, I’m gonna have to give up now.  Got to get off out there shopping, organising, wrapping, writing. panicking. Only 15 days to go aargghh…

Come to think of it,  you know I was wrong before, writing this post isn’t like work.  Getting ready for Christmas is though.

What’s wrong with a stream of consciousness then?

My husband doesn’t ‘get’ blogging

‘Who has time to read other people’s streams of consciousness?’ he’ll snort.

Well, these days I do.  And I write a stream of consciousness myself.  Oh, I know it should be more than that, and I know most blogs are more wonderful, funny and informative, than mine.   But the thing with streams of consciousness-es is that they show us that, across the world, underneath it all, we all have the same basic irritations, anxieties, and joys in life.

For instance, the great blog that I read by Nathan Badley ‘Dear man in front of me at the gas station’ certainly rang bells (read Nathan’s Blog).

I’m very new to blogging, and new to reading them too, and I’ve been delighted to find so many like-minded people, spending often what little spare time they have, telling me about their lives.  It’s also a delight to read pieces with an oblique slant on things, blogs that make me think. I’ve seen some funny ones written, and sometimes, drawn, by talented and interesting individuals.  I found recipes and advice, and critiques on books I have yet to read.  The blogging world has been a revelation to me.

And what of my own efforts?  Well, I intended to use this blog as merely a tool to encourage me to write most days, and it’s working.  The discipline of thinking up a topic and title is forcing me to expand my thoughts (not far…yet!).  You see, having had a tough time at work for the last year or so, my thoughts have dwelt obsessively and depressingly there.  My mind was shackled to the office, my previously soaring imagination suppressed and unused. However, despite it taking a little time, gradually the grey dullness is receding and being replaced by the rainbow.  I find myself making up verses randomly, as I had done in the past, and potential stories are seen in everyday situations.  People walking along the street are potential characters – murderers??  My writing is beginning to flow again.

So I apologise for the stream of consciousness, the ramblings, and any rantings which may well follow, but it really is helping me reboot!